Current Music: Sugarcult - Pretty Girl

Second post in a day; on a roll, right? I was looking back at some photographs today...is it normal to be so distraught? I never really appreciated the signifigance of a photograph until one night, many-a-nights ago, when I came to the conclusion that I am reliving my happiest moments thru the frozen memories. It's sometimes difficult to look in that folder, and I can't even pinpoint why. My transition from civilian life to military life was difficult, and I feel like I've been living a double-life ever since. However, on the upside of this, I get to add a whole new album in to my library, one that starts the day I leave Fort Bragg and enter the rest of my life. I don't really think that I should set too high a standard for my "new album", because I don't want to be dissapointed.

**on a side note, Laguna Beach has to be scripted. How the hell can that much drama surround 8 people?**

Some of my friends: Alright, the fall time, traditionally has been a difficult time for most people, mostly people, who in their 20's who are leaving oh-so-blissful summer good times, entering yet another year of self inflicted pain aka BACK TO COLLEGE! Aside from that, the weather is changing, people are throwing on more layers of clothing, instead of the eye pleasing string bikini and mini skirt wardrobe (I'm such a guy), and whatever it is we men wear to catch women's eyes. Since I've been slaving my "life" away to Uncle Sam's every beck and call, my distinction between summer "jams" (thanks Craig David) and everyday duties has been tainted. Anyway, I had a point to this rant, my friends. I'll leave out names to be respectful, however I think people will get the idea. Aside from the difficult fall adjustments, and clothing changes, peoples relationships change as well. Parallel to these few months of changes, Love is lost, maybe found, but mostly lost, (personal experience is noted). Many of my greatest relationships have traditonally spoiled this time of year, and I've never completely figured out why, however I have some theories. My first theory is that Love is challeneged by rapidly transitioning lifestyles and up and exciting possibilities of new experiences, people, romances, friendships, and the fear of (sorry for the military termonolgy here) "failure-to-adapt". scenarios. However, my personal experiences also reflect good transitions, incredible ones...moving on. A close friend of mine lost his love, and it breaks my heart to see him hurt, because he's been a friend for years, and both parties are unconditionally important to me. As for the girl, well, it hurts me equally to see her in pain. However they seem to trying to cope, as I have, I wonder if it's really getting easier, or just temporary blindness (madness?) while in our transitional phases. Someone else close to me is also going through a difficult time, more a string of bad luck to which I'm fortunately a spectator to. One thing after another plagues her transitional phase, and as I will try to push across to strangers who are already reading my confessions, but is already overly evident to my signifigant other(s), I would die (for lack of a better synonym) for them, or at least stand in between them and the continually fast moving train known as "life". <--cliche' I know, but true none-the-less.

As for me, and my transitional phase...let's just say, following suit to peers and self, fall adds to my album, good and bad, more good then bad, but still incredibly difficult and signifigant. I'm still new to expressing myself to strangers, and friends/family. As far as the details, I'll just say I haven't lost Love this season, just altered it, in more ways then expressable. So a tribute to all who qualify, thank you for being here for me, I only hope I am as helpful as you all have been.

I could write in this all night, it's an incredible release which I never thought I'd benifit or enjoy. So, enough of this shit, I have a double date tonight, pillow and blanket.

Night